on Thursday, July 29, 2004
I think i have a sleeping problem. I cant seem to sleep at night. Ended up watching this chick flick and it made me teared up. DAMN.
My mind is spinning these couple of songs all damn day! Argh! Its like the annoying Perfect 10 's advert that had the guy's head with the axe. Anyways, the songs are........
Broken-Seether Feat Amy Lee ( Thanks DraDra! All your fault! Why did you posted the lyrics on the externals?? ARGH! :P )
Pushing Me Away-Linkin Park ( I absolutely loved the lyrics and arrangement of the song!)
This Love- Maroon 5 ( Im not sure if i spelled it correctly but now its stuck in my head because the Bazaar's DJ was playing it like 2-3 times every hour! No choice! LOL)
Linkin Park-Pushing Me Away
I've lied to you
The same way that I always do
This is the last smile
That I'll fake for the sake of being with you
(Everything falls apart, even the people who never frown eventually break down)
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie
(Everything has to end, you'll soon find we're out of time left to watch it allunwind)
The sacrifice is never knowing
Why I never walked away
Why I played myself this way
Now I see your testing me pushes me away
I've tried like you
To do everything you wanted too
This is the last time
I'll take the blame for the sake of being with you
We're all out of time,
this is how we find how it all unwinds
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie
We're all out of time, this is how we find how it all unwinds
The sacrifice is never knowing
Carina
12:59:00 AM
I almost forgot. I will post the pictures up soon! If i can get the whole picture posting thing going that is....LOL
Carina
1:03:00 PM
Last week was filled with activities for me. Its been a while since i was THAT busy.
Anyways....
Last Sat,
Meet the bride to be, Yan and her sister for lunch at Swensens. Its been a while since we met up together for lunch. They kept joking about how i had a salad for lunch since i am never a big fan of greens. Sigh. It was fun though. We basically chatted about everything and anything. Life has taken quite a twist for them. Both married but it was great to see that " happily married" glow from them. I have known both girls for a long time and it is great to see them both settled with their lives. Then we went looking for a tie and thought of methods to torture Allen (Yan's husband) on the big day when he comes knocking on the bride's door. Ha ha ha *evil grin* Then we spilt and i went to Valerie's birthday party. It was FUN FUN FUN! (Thanks Ally for driving me there!) Saw many of my friends who i have lost contact with and many stories of post-poly was traded. Damn! I miss my poly days. Val's house is in Hougang and i have never been there before. What kind of Singaporean am i?? LOL She had a buffet catered to the rooftop of the clubhouse beside the pool. Night was humid but the company was great though.
Sunday...
Woke up around 5.30am. I really had to drag my sleepy self out of bed. That was tough!! ( You owe me one girl!) Went over to Yan's house and prepared a little for the day. Bonded a little with her friends as well. Then right at 8am, the groom came. We tortured him with sweets- White chocolate Kit Kat bar (he hates sweets) , ice laden with salt (Icy) and some sily questions...LOL and of course the "ang pao"...LOL Shall not reveal how much money he gave us for his bride... ha ha!
The whole entourage moved out to Allen's house. That was our first stop. I have never sat in the bridal car before...LOL Yan's dress was so poofy. LOL Anyways we went to his house and stayed for like ten mins and headed to Esplanade for some photo shoots. It was Sunday morning and the tourist crowd was out in full force. Many tourists went ga-ga over the couple in their wedding get-up and took pictures. Yan was playing along and waved at them. *kinda like Princess Di's wedding if you get what i mean..LOL* There was a bridge that linked Esplanade and One Fullerton and so Yan was up there and the "sisters" came down after the picture taking and she decided to throw her bouquet from above. Ahem..I was forced to join in that " singles- discrimination" LOL... The bouquet was heading in my direction and you know the funny part? I ACTUALLY raised my hand to try to catch the bouquet but as it was closing in on me, i suddenly let my hand down again and the flowers smashed onto the ground without me catching it. That was my realisation that i was scared. LOL Maybe it was my fear or the stigma attached with the flowers. However i was the target of endless teasing for the rest of the day. Then we went to Allen's house again to do the tea ceremony and then went back to Yan's house again for the same thing...I couldnt stop yawning. I was so tired..
Came home finally and caught some winks and headed off to the wedding dinner! I was in charge of the reception but i guess Allen's brother took care most of it for me. So i was slacking away until Justin and Xavier came along. It was like the reunion of the four muskerteers except that one of us was getting married. While Yan was heading down the aisle, Justin whispered that now he was finally hit with the fact that Yan's married and we probably wont see each other as often. As soon as he said that, i felt like crying. Admist the happiness, that realisation hit him too and i didnt if i was wrong but i saw a hint of sadness. Thank God he and X were there!!
After we went home, Xavier sent me a good night msg ( he seldom does that): Good Night to you Carina. Hope the four musketeers can meet up some time soon.
Guess i am not the only one. Sigh.
Carina
12:17:00 PM
on Thursday, July 01, 2004
We met 7 years ago thru a mutual friend. She wasnt the "typical" type of friends who i would hang out with. Maybe it was a twist of fate or common interests that brought us together. Now that i think about it, we dont have much in common. She was an introvert in school while i was actively participating in every activity. We used to play basketball after school and our friendship gradually start to form beneath the weirdest circumstances. We didnt talk much during school hours. I hardly see her around. But we would call each other after school to chat about our days if we wouldnt meet after school. We would drag our exhausted selves to the popular Macdonald hang out nearby and just eat ice cream after a basketball game. I dont think anyone in school know that we are friends.
We left and went on to do different things after O levels. Somehow, the basketball nights would remain a ritual. Then both of us got into relationships and then just became too busy for each other. However that was always the phonecalls. We met up but not frequently.
During these past 3 years, we would meet up but we were still so busy individually. Somehow the bond remains unbreakable.
I went to her engagement. Listened to her news of pregnancy and how i am going to be a god mom and next week, i am going to the customary dinner.
It is so funny how life takes many twists and turns. I looked back at the days when we were 14. Now she is going to be a mother and be responsible for another life. We both know that our lives are going to change after the baby. Another chapter of her life is starting and yet i am still waiting here for mine to start. Cant help feeling a little depressed. What have i been doing with my life? What has she done with her? Dont get me wrong. I am extremely happy for her. I just wish i could cherish a little more of that 7 years that went by.
I am going to miss my best friend.
Carina
11:43:00 PM
